★½ (1½ out of 4)
Look, “Spa Weekend” is meant as a ladies’ night lark, just like “Mutiny” is a guy kill fantasy. Dudes enjoy seeing Jason Statham bust heads. And the ladies, we’re told, find it liberating to hang together for snorting blow and no-guilt sex with male strippers. That is when a hot yoga instructor (Adam Demos) isn’t on the buffet.
Really? This is what the gifted women of “Spa Weekend,” played by comic pros Anna Faris, Michelle Buteau, Isla Fisher and Leslie Mann, are stuck with? Two guys as writers and directors. And what have Jon Lucas and Scott Moore, purveyors of the immortal “Bad Moms” and “A Bad Moms Christmas,” concocted for these dazzling divas condescendingly referred to as “women of a certain age” (that means over 50)? Nothing like “Bridesmaids” or “Girls Trip,” which knew how to do right by talent.
A waste of time and talent
For “Spa Weekend,” Lucas and Moore have instructed their female cast to behave like horny teenage boys. It worked for the middle-aged child men they cast in their script for “The Hangover.” But with actual women, the direction feels demeaning. And here’s the worst thing, not funny. Vulgar can be funny—think Melissa McCarthy in “Bridesmaids”—but here it’s just crass.
I suppose I should mention the plot that pivots around the three lifelong friends (we get flashbacks to middle school) who don’t see each other enough. So why not a spa weekend in Palm Springs? The film was actually shot in Australia, so be on the lookout for false leads.
Faris’ Sophie works for an idiot boss but has a husband and child we never see. Buteau’s Coco is taking her next step after divorce. And Mann’s Jane is career focused to the max. They have a fourth friend, Fisher’s Mel, a wild card who’s drifted apart from the core 4, mostly because the other three can’t deal with her.
So naturally Mel is the one who causes all the trouble or at least gets blamed for it. The four actresses strive to build an emotional bond that their writer-directors soon lose interest in, preferring the wild and crazy stuff. That’s short for stupid.
If you agree with that decision, then by all means check in at the waste of talent that is “Spa Weekend.” Never mind that this feeble farce makes 97 minutes of screen time feel like an eternity. And never mind that it’s even worse watching good performers who should know better bow to the worst instincts of the men in charge. Where’s Jason Statham when you need him?